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I long for my home

I hate this feeling…it just sucks. I can’t wait until God will wipe away every tear from my eye and just hold me in his arms.

Maybe my gut instinct was right, maybe I needed to take this leap anyway. Who knows?

Either way the pain is the same and it just sucks.

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Nattie had surgery yesterday to remove the tumor in her stomach. The doctors came back with the scary news that it is inoperable. She will now undergo chemo to extend her life. I can’t IMAGINE what her family must be going through because I’m just plain MAD. She’s too young. WAY too young. And she’s my friend. This isn’t supposed to happen to people who are close to you…maybe grandparents or parents, but friends? Our dear friend Dana has endured cancer herself at way too young an age and has seen several friends suffer. She has been an amazing source of strength and knowledge for all of us. We’re all leaning on each other while praying Nattie knows she can lean on us. But what we all need is rest. I then I found this poem on Rocks in My Dryer that pretty much spoke directly to my heart.

There is nothing–no circumstance, no trouble, no testing–that can ever touch me until, first of all, it has gone past God and past Christ right through to me. If it has come that far, it has come with a great purpose, which I may not understand at the moment. But as I refuse to become panicky, as I lift up my eyes to Him and accept it as coming from the throne of God for some great purpose of blessing to my own heart, no sorrow will ever disturb me, no circumstance will cause me to fret, for I shall rest in the joy of what my Lord is–that is the rest of victory!

–Alan Redpath, former pastor of Moody Church

This is EXACTLY what I plan to do…I will rest in the Lord for THAT is the rest of victory!

Please be praying for Nattie…you can click the picture in the sidebar for updates.

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Please Pray for a dear friend of mine

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My dear friend Natalie aka Nattie just found out she has adenocarcinoma or stomach cancer. It is very rare in American women and actually is most common in non-American men over the age of 65. Nattie is a single mom to two kids and has had her fair share of troubles over the past few years.

Please join me in the bombarding of heaven’s gates as we lift up Nattie before the throne of heaven. As another dear friend mentioned, Nattie is not a statistic and therefore we refuse to believe the scary “facts” about this type of cancer. Instead we’re going to fight through prayer and we’re going to have the faith that God can and WILL deliver our Nattie from this terrible and sucky disease.

We love you Nattie and we’re praying.

This button will also be located in my sidebar where you can go for updates.

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Death and Life…all in a day’s work

Yesterday was a very different day for us. One we don’t usually like in the ministry. One of our families in our church has been praying very hard for the husband’s brother. Well, he went to be with the Lord last Saturday morning. While we didn’t KNOW the brother, as this family’s pastor we attended the memorial service. This man had been an alcoholic and a drug addict, yet the room was packed with people he loved and who loved him. This man struggled through life trying to cure the pain he felt from a life long illness. He had struggled with his life the last few weeks and hours before returning home to be with the Lord he got his life right.

It just reminds me that life is too short. This man was in construction and was a general contractor. The worship center was filled with men and women, many of whom probably had never stepped foot inside a church. And that was pretty evident in some of the comments made by those offering well wishes that were laiden with swear words. But in the celebration of his life, our pastor was able to share the good news of Jesus Christ with his friends and family. We don’t know what tomorrow holds, we must rely on Jesus the author and perfector of our faith to guide us in our walk.

Last night was spent celebrating life. We attended a banquet for the Alpha Pregnancy Center in Palm Coast. We celebrated a ministry that believes in standing up against a battle that is raging across our nation and the world that is MUCH more devastating than any war on terror. Over 3,000 babies are aborted every day! OVER 3,000!!!! That number just blows my mind.

We as a nation stand against terrorists who fly planes into buildings and kill 3,000 people, we are upset to see men and women dying in the name of freedom as they fight a war. WHY can’t we stand up and say ENOUGH when it comes to innocent lives? When it comes to a CHILD who is defenseless and a mother and father who want what is best for themSELVES?

Yesterday was a very emotional day. A day in which we celebrated life. A life that has gone on to an eternal peace and the life that was saved because people stood up against this war on terror I call abortion.

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Struggling to Breath

Some days I feel like we’re doing good. Things are going well.

But most days lately are spent feeling as though I can barely keep this family above water. It’s like I’m constantly doggy paddling and I’m wearing out quicker than I can find relief.

Our house is still on the market. We’ve had a few calls, but the reality is I’m scared. I have no CLUE how to sell a house, but we can’t afford a realtor. So I have to sell it. People call and kind of laugh when I mention the price but we have to break even.

Things are church aren’t going as well as they once were. We’ve just never done this before and it’s hard. That’s all there is to it. It’s hard when we have a house and live 45 minutes away from people we’re trying to minister to. When I can’t seem to get any instrumentalists/singers. When I get some from our main campus only to find they’ve been rescheduled to sing/play there instead of with me. Frustrating I tell ya.

And being pregnant on top of all of this?? Argh. Hormones, frustrations, and stress do not mix well. I need a free realtor, a free housekeeper, free musicians, and a nap. Until then I head to rehearsal tonight, church tomorrow and Sunday, and planning new things for church all next week. We totally need to change our strategy.